


The [Anti]Septic Joke

by EsculentEvil



Category: Batman (Comics), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Agender Character, Angst, Crossover, Fluff, Gen, Headcanon, Hinted AntiHero, Hinted batjokes, Humor, Metafiction, References to My Other Works, Super Sanity, zalgo text
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 04:54:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18958300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EsculentEvil/pseuds/EsculentEvil
Summary: The Joker and Antisepticeye meet over Septic Sam, their heroes, and their realities.((Follow up toThe Septic Joke!))((Quick reminder: I OWN NOTHING I’M CROSSING OVER!!! AntiSepticEye and Septic Sam are owned by Jacksepticeye/Seán McLoughlin; DC owns Joker! All I own ismyJoking MirrorsHC, this idea/story, the resulting OC, and the fanart that inspired it. So! Please enjoy~ ♦))((Also, quickwarning: this does get shippy as I, apparently, can’t saynoto Hero/Villain ships.))





	The [Anti]Septic Joke

"̸YO!͟"͠

The Joker yelps and violently swivels around in his work stool. His panicked eyes dart about before landing on what he can only describe as an apparition. Thick, curling, forest green hair styled with an undercut similar to his own sits atop a wide, manic grin that’s both too sharp and perfectly fitting for a Joker. Mismatched eyes—one black and blue, the other green and black—sparkle with wicked understanding that remind the Joker way too much of himself in _New 52_. A gaping wound—clearly from a knife—mimics the grin floating above while also bleeding profusely down into the collar of a pitch black, scuffed up muscle shirt. Ripped up black jeans, 8mm black gauges, black nail polish, and black combat boots complete the look of whoever the **hell**  just broke into his Ha-Hacienda.

The Joker is **not**  amused; so, he levels the business end of his welding torch with the nose of this punk-goth trespasser and hisses, “Yo, ho, _ho_.”

Antisepticeye laughs, cheers, claps, and **glitches** , "͠I̴'m h҉e͜r͘e͠!͟"҉ 

* * *

After turning off his torch, setting it down beside his newest—very spherical—creation, and removing his protective visor, The Joker squints at his _guest_.

His breath then catches: without the distortion of panic and protective glass, Gotham’s Clown Prince of Crime can now see JackSepticEye’s own _Glitch Bitch_.

Which can only mean one thing; The Joker sighs, “You’re here for _him_.”

Anti only smiles.

* * *

Septic Sam, of course, is all too happy to see one of his owner’s oldest Egos.

The sizeable eyeball zips right over to It before smearing who knows what fluids into the glitchy villain’s cheek as he rubs and nuzzles cheerfully into it.

Anti merely laughs and pats him.

Then, It surprises The Joker.

* * *

"̡N̡o͟w, som͞eţh̵i͢ng ̕t͡o ŅEVER ̛te͟ll̵ Ja͘cki͠e͝bo̸y̢-M̕a͞n҉: ҉Sa͢m **is** ̢a͜ we̴a̵p̕o̕n͢.̕"̷   


They’re back in The Joker’s workroom, mugs of hot chocolate in hand, and eyeballing the mock eyeball Gotham’s criminal clown had been working on. Septic Sam is sitting beside it, long and soft optic nerve hugging the object.

From what The Joker has gathered, he and Anti are only here, still, because Sam actually likes him and wants him to have his own version of him.

(But what would I call it?) The fool ponders this. (Septic Clown? Snigger Sam?) Then, another question comes to his deranged mind, “Who’s Jackieboy-Man?” He vaguely recalls seeing an Ego like that in one of JackSepticEye’s videos, but he could have sworn it was called _Jackaboyman_? Where did the _ie_ come from?

Unaware of the other’s thoughts or the direction they’re headed (Random Town), Anti quietly answers: "͞M͏y͘ ͘f҉oi͏l ...̴ m̧҉̷y̸̵̧̛ ͏̕B͏̧̛͠a̧̢͢͝t̸̵̸.͏͟҉̢"̵̡̕̕  


The Joker makes a surprised noise, eyes going wide, and turns to interrogate the other about Its Bat and his ridiculous name and why the word _bat_  isn’t in it before shutting his mouth with a _clack!_  Sympathy and emotions were never his strong suit—he isn’t even sure there **is**  a purple emotion—but he doesn’t need Harleen to tell him that he just found a sore spot with his new friend. Sibling.

 **Joker**.

Because that’s what this Anti person is: yet another version of himself that exists simply to comment and entertain with cruel explosions and crazy energy. But, this Joker knows, It’s also a Joker that has yet to reach that orgasmic point where **both** Joke and Bat **understand** their reason for being **together**.

Anti’s Jackieboy-Man doesn’t know what they really are and doesn’t accept it—he can’t—and this Joker remembers how heartbreaking it was to suffer that.

So, he quickly makes a loud, disgusted sound in order to draw Anti’s attention. Then, with a dramatically arched eyebrow, the comedic villain points and asks, “So... That’s actually a **Robin**???”

Anti and Sam blink at the clown before Anti snorts and Sam’s pupil curves up, “H̸a̧!̛ G͠u͜ess ͟so!̴”

“Gross!” the two share a laugh, allowing the gloom and tension to release.  


* * *

It takes days to complete this world’s version of Septic Sam.

During that time, the foils share jokes. Anti tells The Joker about Its  _Bat_  and his bad habits (“He͜ **l̶iterall̕y** ͢r̵un҉s a͟round̕ ̨w͡it̵h͢ ̡h͞i͝s ar͠ms҉ oųt̷ ͡lik̶e̕ ͟he͘'͝s̷ f͡o͏o̴ki̢ņ' **fiv͘e͡**!̢”) while The Joker lets Anti in on all the ridiculous delusions his own _Bat_  has (“Honestly, he truly believes that he’s saving everyone when he saves me; nevermind that I’m the killer; he just doesn’t want to admit I **am** everyone.”).  


They also happen upon a name.

This is the result of The Joker’s epiphany a few days prior. After realizing that the ball was actually a _Bird_ , the purple-suited clown necessitated a related moniker; so the black-clothed clown tossed out a few puns (It liked _Bird’s Eye_ ) before they all finally settle on the perfect thing: _Mockingbird_.

Septic Sam bounces happily as his new brother boots up.

When the bot’s orange-red iris meets his blue, they high-five (High-one?).

* * *

Once Mockingbird is complete, Anti and Septic Sam are supposed to leave.

As beings not of his universe, The Joker knows they can’t/shouldn’t stay.

This is why he’s surprised when they remain.

Not that he’s complaining.

* * *

“You know what I find most intriguing?”  


Anti looks up from surfing the internet with Mockingbird; they’re both educating themselves/each other on the nuances of this Joker’s world. It frowns, “W͏ha̶t̡?̴”  


“You don’t dress like a clown; you dress like the _Bat_.”  


It glances down for a moment, appearing to take in Its own attire, before staring dartingly at The Joker’s, “ I̶ ͝thi͠nk .͡.͡. ̸” The YouTuber’s antithesis pauses, glitches, and then looks **through**  The Joker, “T̨hat's̵ ̡be̷c̡a̕u͘se͢ ̵Ja҉c͜͞͝k͘̕͝i̷e̸ d̷res͏ses̕ ҉lik̨e a ̴J̧ok͞e͞.”  


The purple-suited villain raises a brow.

Anti smiles, still seeing the hero The Joker cannot, “I͏n̸ a ̵v̧ib̕r͘an͢t ̕r͡ed one̡s͢i͡e ̷tha̧t͡ ob̷no̢xi̕oưs̛l͜y ͏glo̧ws͏, a n̨eo͘n b͠lue̵ ḑomino͏ t̢h҉a̶t ̡put̶s ̧a ̵b͠ull̴s͢-ęye o̸n͠ h̸is dam̢n̸ no̧se͠, ̡a̵nd p͡as͠t͜el ̷gre̴e͞n ha͘i͡r that s̛c̶rea̶m̵s to th̴e ̕worl̶d͞ _I̡t҉̵’̛s̴ ̧a̢̧l͜͡w̧̛͢a̸͢ys̵ ͏͜G̷̸̢O͏͘͜͢͞ ̨͝҉̶T̨̕͠I̢͠M̶҉̸E҉͏̶͏͜,҉ ̛͞b̕͠ros̷_.̡͘.͢͝.͢” The Leprachaun Joker smiles calmly, lovingly, **brokenly** , “H̢͞e̢̕ ̡̨͜c̡͘o̴̶̧͟l҉̧͞o̷̡̕͜r̷͢͝s̢͜͝͠ ҉̕m͢͡͞y͢ w̕҉͝o҉̕r͢l͝d͞͠.͢͜”

The Leading Joker is silent for some time.

Then, he opens: “Onesie? Your _Bat_ really **is**  five.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to ignore the following ramble: it contains explanations you might be interested in but it's really just me talking to followers on my Tumblr.
> 
> ((So... there’s supposed to be more to this—Anti and Sam saying goodbye, them goofing off with Mockingbird and The Joker, world exploring and Bat [fam] meetings—but... I’m just not up to it. The point of this was to express my love of both Joker and Antisepticeye as I see them. I did it. But, in doing this, I’ve also expressed to myself why I’ve been feeling more drawn to Anti lately: he feels more alive than any Joker I’ve recently seen; he inspires and excites me more than DC; Jacksepticeye, for all that he doesn’t know me, is a sweetheart who’s been with me in the dark. And, since Jack/Sean is at least real and actively reaches out to the/his community... I guess I feel a little less crazy for feeling like Anti [and Jack/Sean] is here for me and encouraging me.))
> 
> ((I know vast majority of my followers are with me for my BatJokes and Joker content; and while I still love The Joker [all of them] very much—hence me wanting to give him a decent goodbye—I don’t think I’ll be writing or drawing him/them much any more. I’m leaving this AntiJokes open-ended in the hopes that I’ll eventually come back/full circle—but, for now and until then...))
> 
> **((This is a harbinger of change: my blog won’t be Batjokes/Joker centered anymore.))**
> 
> ((Please expect more Anti, Jack, JSEgo, etc content from now on. Also AntiHero, Danti, Janti.))
> 
> ((If none of that is your jive, I understand and will miss you.))
> 
> ((If it is... Stick around so we can g̛̤͉͚̻͎̪̜ͤ͗͌ͭ̇̅ͭl̟͍͉̯̦̗͖͐̀͘͞i̸̢͐̌͐̽̐ͅṯ̾̓͌̚̚c͆̽͆ͮ͏̝̼̙̬̬̱̪͍͢h̞̟́̔́̂͡ a bit! ♦))


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